How Has It Come To This?

Just last night, Darling Husband and I were driving to our first parent meeting for Toddler's new preschool, where he will be going in the fall.  On the way over, I was wondering how we managed to find ourselves in this situation?  Us, at a parents meeting for school?  Really?  I mean, we got dressed up and everything.

I can visualize myself in a lot of roles in life, and I've played a lot of roles already.  I've finally even accepted my role as "mommy," although I'm still having a hard time believing it.  But when did we go from "mom and dad" to "parents" at a school meeting? When did that happen? 

After all, I may be 37 years old, but some days I think I still have one foot in college.  I am definitely not one of those moms on the playground that definitely thinks she has all the answers and is happy to advise all the other moms.  (That mom, more often than not, is quite a bit younger than me but thinks she is older and wiser.  It's funny sometimes when you don't look your age.)  In fact, I'm the mom that forgot to take really important things with her when she left the house with the kid the first few times ... like food ... and stuff.  You know -- the basics. 

I don't know if people think I look like I've got it all together, but I sure seldom feel like I've got it all together, and I don't think I've got it all together.  (I don't think the mom on the playground that says she has it altogether really does, either.  I think she's just making it all up.  No.  Really.  I think that.  I also think that if you spend too much time reading parenting books and magazines, then you are compensating for something.)

So, in the middle of all this, I have to ask how it is I managed to become the responsible adult in this household?  And, does anyone really think that was a wise idea?  Moreover, who was silly enough to let my kid into a co-op preschool where I will now be the responsible adult for an entire classroom of three year olds, and sometimes other kids, at least one day a month?

Sitting in those little chairs with my knees up in my chest didn't provide any answers.  The fact that my child was the only one who had to come with us to the meeting just made the feeling worse.

The fact that he introduced himself and played quietly with one of the veteran moms, was very polite, and in general acted like a well-behaved little man and not the wild hooligan he was being not half an hour before did make me feel a little better.  The fact that membership in the co-op gives me the option to join a babysitting co-op makes me feel even better.  Then again, I think a co-op babysitting group means someone will be giving me their child ... alone ... without any other adult supervision.

Oh dear.