Better To Remain Silent....

>> Friday, January 15, 2010

This afternoon Darling Husband gave me a little present. Part way through lunch, he offered to continue helping Toddler finish his sandwich and "mushy veggies". Of course, I willingly took the offer, because Toddler is quite possibly the slowest eating two year old on the planet. I think he might be in the running for the Guinness Book of World Records or something. Give me a chance to step away for some quiet time without having to remind a small child to, "Take a drink! Chew, chew, swallow! Don't put more in your mouth until you swallow what you have!" and I'll jump high to take it. (Okay, maybe we all didn't really need that visual.)

So, off I went, quick quick like a bunny, before Darling Husband could come to his senses and change his mind. Hmm. I wonder if his offer had anything to do with me foaming him a chocolate glazed donut latte with my new milk spinner. I wonder how many lattes it will take to get him to put the dishes in the dishwasher? Oh. Lattes make more dishes. Well, that's a bad idea.

Anyway, I snuck off to the livingroom, which is both the warmest room in the house and is completely lacking a television. I figured the chances of sticky faces following me were slimmer in that room, and maybe, just maybe, I could read two pages of my current book consecutively. Maybe. Worth a shot.

So, I went, sat down, opened my book, and actually managed a few pages before I heard something strange from the kitchen. At first it sounded like Homer Simpson moved in.


Then I heard some furious whispering.

Then I most certainly and clearly heard a "Bill Cosby" moment come from Darling Husband's mouth. "Will you stop touching that!"

A few moments later and a little bit louder, I heard "Toddler! Please! You are making a huge mess, and Mommy is going to blame me if your new sweater is covered in food! Stop!"

Aah, justice. This eavesdropping was sweet, because just the other day Darling Husband was teasing me for sounding like the rest of Bill Cosby's skit: "Come here! Come here! Here! Here! Now!"

Be careful what you laugh at when toddlers are involved. What comes around goes around, and around, and around, and around ....


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